Here at Billionaires for Educational Reform, we will decide the best ways to train the great unwashed. We’ve had it up to here with paying taxes for an educational system that’s of no earthly use to us, and we’re investigating new ways to turn out a more suitable class of worker.
For one thing, we’re livid about job protection for teachers. Since teachers seem to make more money as they work more years, why not simply fire them before they reach high salaries? Then, we can replace them with new teachers and fire them after a few years.
This will not only keep salaries down, but will save us the necessity of paying for pensions. I mean, for goodness’ sake, why can’t these people live off their investments and rental properties? I had to pull myself up by my bootstraps with nothing but a trust fund, a string of properties, and my inheritance. Let them do the same.
Let’s get in there and start making the system work for us. If we must fund public schools, let’s make sure that they benefit us.
Smellington G. Worthington III