There’s a new article over at the excellent publication, The New York Daily News.  I don’t often peruse this particular publication, as it pertains primarly to pictorial postulations, but this just pops with peppery punch.

One of Mikey’s new principals explains how he saved a dying school.  It’s admirable.  All he did was turn out the malcontents and rabble-rousers, and then pack the halls with enthusiastic newcomers.  By stocking the new school with enthusiastic fresh rabble, things improved tremendously.  Apparently there are several other schools in this building, and Lord knows what goes on in them, but the fact that this one works is good enough for me.

And what to do with those that were turned out?  We’ll gladly take them into the new Smellington Academy, where we guarantee excellent results.  In fact, any teacher who doesn’t pass 100% of our students will be dismissed forthwith.  What more could one ask?

Well, must dash.  Muffy and the poolboy appear to be in a position from which they’re curiously unable to extricate themselves.  Remarkable how much time those two spend repairing that walk-in closet.  Must get a servant on it right away.

Smellington G. Worthington III



Filed under Bravo, Bravo old chap!, old chap!, plebs, rabble, Riff-raff, Smellington Academy, Training the great unwashed

5 responses to “Excellent

  1. KIPP teacher

    Charter schools help kids and kids need their help. I don’t think you should call kids rabble. I agree with you that they should have choices and its very good they can choose that other school instead of the failing one.

  2. augustsmythe

    I don’t think old Smelly meant anything by calling the rabble ‘rabble’. I think he’s just trying to make a distinction between academy attendees such as ourselves and the little urchins who will someday work for us.

    I agree that the spawn of the unwashed should have choices. Recently, I had several openings and I gave applicants a choice between pulling weeds in the garden and washing dishes. I must say, both of my new employees performed admirably, having been well trained at long days at pointless tasks by the public schools under Bloomy’s watch.

    • KIPP teacher

      Well it’s nice that you give people jobs because hard work never hurt anyone but i still don’t think you should call them unwashed. Why not just call them poor? It’s great that you’re starting a charter school. Then there won’t be so many kids doing pointless tasks. Anyway if you’re looking for teachers I know some good people.

  3. Fatsworth G. Higfratter III

    The rabble are certainly tedious.

  4. KIPP teacher

    What a terrible way to speak about people. Just because you have money doesn’t give you the right.

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