Tag Archives: the masses

For the Love of Smedley

A Facebook friend recently sent me this link, about how the wealthy have acquired more capital as of late. This would not be so shocking if it were not portrayed as a bad thing. I tire of going back to basic principles, but it’s well-known that persons of no account have no idea how to handle capital. They fritter it away on food, rent, and other such trifles when its true magic is investment. If they aren’t going to make it grow, why should they have it at all?

Don’t their very own tax dollars finance food stamps? Aren’t there soup kitchens and shelters? Why don’t they simply make use of those facilities, buy the Wall Street Journal, and figure out the best ways to enrich whatever pittance they may come across? That’s what this country is all about, by George.

Pulling one’s self up by one’s bootstraps is, of course, troublesome for the bootless and unhorsed. This notwithstanding, it’s their duty to do so. Let it be a challenge to them, say I.  This is capitalism, and it’s what my father sweated for when meeting his lawyers to determine how best to dispense our trust funds and portfolios. If all parents went to this trouble, there’d be less foul-smelling rabble, and the world would be a better place.

Must dash. Muffy seems to have locked herself into a closet with the poolboy, and I must dispatch a servant to open it with all due haste.

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Filed under Holy crumpet!, old chap!, plebs, rabble, Riff-raff, Training the great unwashed, Uncategorized

Bravo, Wisconsin!

I say, this is encouraging, a breath of fresh air if ever there’s been one.  Finally, a governor has taken action against the odious ruffians who always go on about wanting more money. Now that the tax burden has finally been lowered on those of us who know how to handle capital, the infernal government still needs a way to cover its expenses. It makes perfect sense to take it from the peasants, who in any case fritter it away on frivolities like food and rent.

This chap has eliminated this troublesome “collective bargaining” claptrap, and has also made sure these blasted unions cannot collect dues. Such funds will be given on a voluntary basis from the rabble that would otherwise be compelled to contribute, and this is smashing news. We won’t have those wretched unions to kick around anymore, and we won’t need to tolerate their blasted messages, “Oh, we need health care,” or, “Oh, we can’t make a living,” or “Oh, we need trained teachers.”

The fact is, we could easily train the bootless and unhorsed to work at Walmart or some other such odious location. They seem to flock to such places, so why should they not be employed there? And the sooner we rid ourselves of these troublesome unions, the sooner we’ll be able to place them there. Education should be offered on a strictly for-profit basis, and should be run by those in the business of business.

Mikey is quite right that those who disrespected Cathie are an affront to democracy. Soon we shall clear that up, and democracy will be whatever Mikey says it is. That’s as it should be. It’s folly to entrust the rabble with democracy. Soon we shall tell them precisely what democracy is, and they will like it, or be pummeled by the National Guard.

Smellington G. Worthington III

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Filed under Bravo, Bravo old chap!, Holiday Cheer, old chap!, plebs, rabble, Riff-raff, Training the great unwashed, Uncategorized

Dashing Good News

I say, it’s high time those liberal snobs in the New York Times got off their high horse and gave us some credit for all the good we do.   Finally there’s a column that acknowledges our role in starting charter schools.  And it’s not like the rest of the country, where they actually create or rent buildings for them.  In this state, we get right in there, eject the undesirable vermin that infest the public schools, and plop our programs right there.

Where else but Mikey’s New York would such innovation take place?  We’re here, we’re wealthy, get used to it.  The hip new thing is education, of course, and since there are billions in it, why on earth shouldn’t we profit from it?  I’m weary of those socialist ne’er do wells who harp on the various bailouts.  If they bailed out the banks, there’s no reason they can’t damn well bail out the charter magnates as well.

We’re doing our bit to rid society of those awful unions and give teachers wages we think they deserve.  Wages we can afford, and still turn a healthy profit.  And we’ll show these little urchins that their hard work can result in even more profit for us.  The scourge of organized labor is coming to a screeching halt, and I’m thankful the liberal New York Times is spreading the word for us.  It’s like Christmas is weeks early and we don’t even have to bear the expense of the lumps of coal we’d budgeted for the dirty little scamps.

I wish you all a lucrative holiday season and a profitable New Year.  Must dash.  Muffy and the poolboy are raising a ruckus in the rumpus room.

Smellington G. Worthington III

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Filed under Bravo, Bravo old chap!, Holiday Cheer, plebs, rabble, Riff-raff, Training the great unwashed, Uncategorized

What Rot

I say, when I read things like this on the internets, they go right up my nose.  What sort of bounder publishes embarrassing photos of Mikey like that one?  Not only that, but this chap is outright disrespectful not only to Mikey, but to the entire concept of mayoral control.

I say, hear hear to Mikey for refusing to compromise in any way.  The only way to get the rabble in line is to control their education from the beginning, without any of this flapadoodle from the bootless and unhorsed.  Oh, the parents have to have their say.  I say, what on earth do these parents know?  If they had any sense they’d be rich.

Now sure Mikey is new money, which means he’s not as well-versed in the stuff as those of us who’ve always had it, but honestly, can you really compare Mikey, the richest chap in the city (hear hear!) to the rabble?  I say, hip, hip hooray, and for he’s a jolly good fellow!  Those who think otherwise are not worthy to touch the hem of his garment.

Smellington G. Worthington III

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Filed under Bravo, Bravo old chap!, old chap!, plebs, rabble, Riff-raff, Training the great unwashed, Uncategorized

A Voice of Reason

I say, these internets are a great source of inspiration.  Why just today I was perusing the Gotham Schools blog thingie, and I found a parent willing to speak up against the involvement of parents.  The chap called himself “Dissenter,” and was willing to give up the popular notion that anyone but the moneyed class should take part in the education of the urchins that blight our fair city.

Now if only more rabble would share that view, we’d be able to get even more of the cheap labor our city needs.  I was thrilled, truth be told, and I’m sharing my response below in its entirety:

I agree with this Dissenter chap. Why on earth should the bootless and unhorsed have any say whatsoever in the education of their children? Rabble need to be guided with a firm hand, and Mikey Bloomberg is just the man to do it, by Jove.

I also agree it’s union chicanery, and this Randi Weingarten woman is only pretending to support Mikey, while in secret she’s plotting to ask for more money for those awful teachers, who are always blathering on about one thing or another. Frankly, they make me ill with their demands of lower class sizes, and time off for this and that.

Fire them all, I say, and give them something to really complain about. And as for the rabble, we’ll train them to do what needs to be done. No more of this namby-pamby mollycoddling.

Smellington G. Worthington III

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Filed under Bravo, Bravo old chap!, innovation, plebs, rabble, Riff-raff, Training the great unwashed

Deep Disappointment

That’s what I feel as I stroll the streets today and see all the urchins lollygagging about.  There’s simply no reason for that, and once we open the Smellington Academy they’ll know what it means to get a job done.  And the riffraff on the street!  Why aren’t these people working, for the love of Smedley?

I say, I support Mikey and Joel with the best of them (and of course I wouldn’t consider association with anyone else) but you have to draw the line somewhere.  I mean, it’s bad enough they aren’t coming in weekends.  Let’s not compound this outrage.

I shall have a talk with Mikey and we’ll see the urchins trudge through the snow next time, as well they should.

Smellington G. Worthington III

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Filed under innovation, old chap!, plebs, rabble, Riff-raff, Smellington Academy, Training the great unwashed, Uncategorized

Bravo, Chaps

I say, the folks at Gotham Schools are providing an excellent forum for those who’d speak reason.  Look here, and here, for some excellent defenses of the great work Mikey and Joel are doing.

Hip, hip, hooray to those who stand up for Mikey and Joel under these trying circumstances. It takes some gumption to stand up to the rabble and say what ho, even though you voted for term limits, we still need a billionaire to run things. And to those Gloomy Guses who say, “It hasn’t gotten any better” under Mikey and Joel, I say, better for whom?

As ably pointed out in those comments, were there mayoral control, Rudy Crew may have been able to enact some of the changes he wished. It’s neither here nor there that Mikey would have dismissed him posthaste before allowing him to squander funds on such nonsense. And it’s also important to note that, as pointed out above, it makes no difference whatsoever whether or not the rabble gets good test scores. The important thing is to involve as many of them as possible in the process, so as to keep the little urchins occupied and off the streets.

I for one have had it up to here with hearing the chancellor needs to protect the interests of the students. What rot. The chancellor must protect our interests , not the whims of the bootless and unhorsed. I daresay he’s doing a damn good job of it. Thanks to the good people who comment at Gotham Schools for providing voices of reason against unruly rabble who insist on raising needless objections.

Smellington G. Worthington III

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Filed under Bravo, Bravo old chap!, old chap!, plebs, rabble, Riff-raff, Training the great unwashed